Gym (dating) Etiquette

How do you approach someone at the gym; if at all?

I've been at my gym for a year now and there is always a new hotty showing up, but how exactly do you speak to them when they have ear phones jammed in their ears/with their mate/posing in front of the mirrors (I mean doing weights...)

Now in terms of guys talking to me I've had two different approaches:

1) In the steam room where I'm near to naked and it's just me and him. That awkward conversation begins and I was too polite to make my excuses (20 years too young) and do a runner! Instead I let the steam get to the point where I was at fainting point and then left. (20 minutes later).

2) This approach happened just the other week and stemmed this post.

There I was, on Bank Holiday Sunday (yes, that is how interesting my life is, gym on a Sunday and even more so a Bank Holiday!)

There I was sat (note: earphones in) on the abs machine - yes ok, I was replying to a text, but I had just done a rep of 20 so was having a breather and again it was Bank Holiday Sunday making the gym near enough empty.

This guy comes up to me, his lips start moving, I look behind me to remember all there is, is a brick wall. Excellent it's me his lips are moving to.

As you know from previous posts I'm always too polite to ignore/tell them to piss off. In true Daniela style I took my earphones out and listened to what he was saying whilst thinking of the quickest/politest way to get him to go away.

He came out with lines like, 

"Not see you in here before"

"What you doing here on Bank Holiday Sunday?"

One question I got was what music was I listening to which resulted in me picking up my Ipod with a follow up question of; 

"Oh is that one of the cool ones that do video?" I replied; "I'm not sure my boyfriend brought me it so to put my music on".

There, boyfriend card played surely he would leave me alone now? No, instead I then get grilled about my "boyfriend" that I don't have. He eventually clicks I don't want to talk to and leaves me be... 20 minutes later!

So gym etiquette; how do you do it, if at all? 

Put it this way, I haven't got a clue! I do know however the 2nd approach won't be it!

For the past four months now I've seen the same "red sweatpants boy" and all we manage to exchange is the uncomfortable smile. I mean I don't want to just wade up to him! He may pull the "girlfriend" card and then what?

I think if at all, the best approach maybe that awkward silence in the steam room/sauna.

Now just to work out how to get him in there...!

ERROR

Let me set the scene, its a Thursday night in May, no work the next day, there I am sat in the pub with my friend that I haven't seen for a few weeks, catch up intended, when it gets announced there is a pub quiz going on. Excellent, our girlie chat is unlikely to happen over the quiz master asking a question on the latest  issues in the world. 

With that being said my friend thinks its a GREAT idea to get a quiz sheet (being free and all that) and participate. The first error, we are sat outside and we can't hear a thing, solution: send me to the door and report back. 

It didn't take long to work out that we weren't the smartest on current affairs and wasn't going to get far. Solution: My friend knew a group of lads at the pub, apparently they were smarter than us as she approached them for the answers, this 

1. made us look like total blonde bimbos (would like to point out me and her are naturally brunette!) and 

2. not the smartest people going! Anyway this failed attempt of getting answers to our quiz worked in my favour when I got talking to one of the guys in the group, not bad looking, possibly a little on the short side but that could be forgiven and was ever so slightly drunk! Anyway this chat may of lasted for a brief 10 minutes before I went to the bar for another drink. (We had given up on the quiz by this point) 

We'd managed to find some seats inside that we plonked ourselves on and chatted over the quizmaster. 

Throughout our girlie chat we had some of these lads come over to stop and talk (the short guy didn't seem to want to approach, just stare - I think he was slightly intoxicated - I did get a smile every now and again however!).

It came to last orders so me and my friend began to make a move, in the process I passed the guy and smiled in one last ditch attempt.

Walking out the door he comes walking up behind me and asks for my number having an Iphone and me being a Blackberry user I had to dictate my number and the spelling of my name to ensure he put 1 L instead of the usual 2 people like to adopt!

The next line I wasn't expecting. He said 

"Thanks, I want to take you out sometime but I go to Thailand on Sunday for 2 weeks so I will give you a text when I get back" 

Didn't expect this in the slightest, surely this is a line you use when you are trying to avoid a date?

Two weeks passed, my friend text asking if I had heard anything (I had actually not really thought about it) but seems she mentioned it I'd realised I hadn't. 

A few days later, he pops up on my WhatsApp asking if I was out in town that night, hello to you too! My reply after three days of constant partying already was obviously the standard no, which was then followed up with him wanting to take me out that week. I checked my diary, fully booked. Following week, yes, Ok he will contact me nearer the time.

That week came and I didn't hear anything, funnily enough though in that same week I was walking out my gyms doors and who appears to be walking in.... Him! As you do I said hello thinking he knew exactly who I am, by his response I'm assuming he didn't have a clue, didn't realise I was the girl from the pub nor taking me out was ever going to happen. ERROR, I think so!

Spectator in a Crowd

Recently I went back up to uni to meet up with my fellow ex student friends to remember amazing times and try be them 18-21 year olds we once were.

There I was stood in O'Neils waiting to buy a drink. As you do, I took a glance around to check out the talent (if any). That's when I spotted my type - All Saints/Indie, that clean yet unshaven look a good height and just all round yum.

Obviously having to take drinks back to my friends I thought I'd come back to tackling him later.
Well there I was catching up with the uni clang that I forgot about Mr Hot Stuff until we later got into Roper.

Once again I'm stood at the bar (yes a lot of alcohol was consumed that night) I took a glance around and who do I lock eyes with, Mr Hot Stuff from O'Neils. All of a sudden I'm thinking, "awkward"- what do I do he is still staring. I can't look away - in fact I don't want to! He then gives me that acknowledgement nod and smile in which I wave back and smile only to then be interupted by my friend giving me my drink. Damn! I've lost Mr Hot Stuff again!

Stood in my group of friends Mr Hot Stuff is walking towards us struggling with shots and drinks. In my nervous disposition he glances at me and shrugs with his cheeky look, his body language reading," Look at all these drinks", in which I reply: " Need a hand sure I can take them off you!" His reply back then ends up being a laugh and another gleaming smile.

Am I in there? - I know I didn't follow just kept staring at his ass. Nice ass he had! I whisper to my girlies as you do tellling them of him. One of them as discreet as she is (not) started pointing at him and saying shall I go pinch his arse or better still tell him you think he's hot.

All of a sudden memories of school playground antics come back into view and I realise I'm not 12 anymore I'm a fully grown woman at 23. I grab my friends arm dragging her back and say how I'll approach him later.

I didn't approach him later every time I saw him he was with a different girl, then I wondered if he was a student and if so ew he will be younger than me. So instead I stood in the distance constantly exchanged smiles with him and thought that I wouldn't ruin something that looked so perfect by him talking. - Well this is the excuse I told myself to cover in me bottling it!

Too much too soon? or a case of "just not that into you?"

Sat across the room at my friends from this amazingly hot guy and I realise he is staring back at me. I feel all my christmas' have come at once! Who ever thought I would get someone interested in me who looks like they've stepped out of a model catalogue.


Heading to town we start speaking he asks me the question of; "are you single?" My reply, "yes".
Gaping at him I obviously ask the same question back, getting the reply I was hoping for.


The only catch I later find out is that he has only been out of a long term relationship for 5 minutes, this was actually the first time he'd been out since their split.


After a couple hours of flirting and me trying to appear disinterested, he disapeared only to not be seen again.


Good old facebook, inbox, 1 message.
Oh look its the guy apologising about his disappearance but also telling me his interest and giving me his number.


I pondered a reply, I debated taking his number, I mean he'd just come out of a relationship, did I really want to be his rebound despite how hot he looked? - I went with no.


Couple of days later there I am sat on facebook and he pings me.


"Hi did you get my number?" (I had obviously not text him)
"Yeah"
"Why haven't you used it?"
"Donno" (all the while thinking rebound rebound but thinking so bloody hot! Why wouldn't you!)
It resulted in me getting a guilty conscious and handing over my number.


Well I'd say it was a good month of excuses and texts between us, as well as some same place same time drunken chats and his friend and mine saying give the guy a chance (again still had rebound engraved in the back on my mind) before we went on our first date.


All went well, great first date (obviously because I planned it) but what guy wouldn't be impressed with getting to play fifa at the end of their first date.
I'd like to say I totally kicked his ass but this wasn't so. I did however on Mario Kart! I'm not a total damsel in distress!


We kept meeting up and hanging out obviously we shared more than just your standard chat and the whole rebound flag in my head had been completly burnt and not thought about again.


Amazement even struck with him when a shopping trip occured and he was allowed to take charge. There was I playing coat hanger outside the changing room offering the "ooos" and "ahhhs" and "that looks good", instead of him (yes guys I'm pretty spectacular!)


I guess I should of clicked it wasn't going to last when his dad asked if I was a dental nurse! In which I had to reply no and thought to myself my job isn't even close to that.


Me being me I swept it under the carpet didn't even ask questions to the guy about it and proceeded.


As they say, how the new year starts it will probably follow through the year.
Well mine started with a quiet front from the guy which proceeded even quieter around my birthday.
I did receive a birthday text but no birthday appearance. This is when I knew it was getting called a day.


"Too much too soon."


His response when he finally broached the subject a few days later.


Since it came to an end I have found out in the month he was texting me to try to convince me otherwise he was seeing someone else that, I managed to accumalate as a bit of a pass through stalker. She played the 20 questions game with a friend of mine and apparently was pretty happy to find out I'd not been successful in keeping him around either.


I like to think I wasn't another girl on his list and that he was "into me" but that I will never know. Saying that, I do understand the whole "just come out of a relationship" as we have all been there. - His real motive I will never know.


If there is anything I would recommend to others and note to myself for future reference, I would advise the following:


1. Rebound flag leave it up
2. When their dad/family member asks if you are a dental nurse and your not, or anything close to, maybe alarm bells should start ringing!
3. In future make sure they're out of a relationship for at least 8 months as this is a substantial amount of time for them to possibly not use the relationship card as a get out clause.


Or maybe... He's just not that into you! In this case... Me!

"If I had 6 months to live would you marry me?"

At work I got asked the above question by one of the lads on my team.
My response to him, harsh I know, was:

"Well, I don't have 6 months to live which means I get a wider choice to select from, so why exactly if I'm not the one dying am I going to settle for you?"

His response:

"because you'd technically be making my last 6 months a happy 6."

Personally I would class this as a chat up line, a pretty bad one, as:

1. The fact he wants to marry me before we've even dated, a bit extreme.
2. Again, where are my benefits from this scenario.
3. Would it really be happy, cleaning up after a dead man walking?

Fair enough if I did love the guy and then obviously everything would be beneficial for me, but I'd known him not even a month and here he was guilt tripping me into marrying a dead guy.
Talk about playing on my heart strings!

He did however leave me a great get out clause! I was left to do deadline on my own as he was a no show,  (and no, this wasn't because he was "dying") in response I left him a nice constructed post-it note stuck to his computer screen. "Thanks for leaving me in the lurch, I am now heartbroken from it and any signs of us getting together are now sadly gone!"  - Brilliant for me!

He now doesn't work where I do but every now and again will drop me a text or a Facebook message pushing his luck and referring to himself as my husband.
I thought he would of been dead by now being 6 months down the line, obviously the "illness" he had didn't take effect and he is now beaming with health waiting to be my fully fledged husband.

Well I defiantly think he can keep on dreaming!

I would just like to clarify that this is a hypothetical situation and this guy isn't going to die.

A dangerous drive. New way to find a date?

I got my new car about a month ago now and not even 24 hours of having it I nearly sent a guy flying off his bike, (by bike I mean push bike).


I would however, like to blame the car that was slowly creeping out of the inside lane on the roundabout which resulted in my view being blocked. As you do though, I began to follow the other car out, followed the car a bit too much, as out of no where a guy comes flying round the roundabout swerves to just miss the rear end of my car to come in quite close contact with the pavement!


In such a fluster I abandoned my car and went running to his side only to get graced with "Fuck off" which I guess was half deserved! Later once he'd calmed down and I was in a stupid amount of shock we got talking (well, he did to try and calm me down) and I found out that he'd moved to Peterborough and doesn't particularly like it, where he worked, what his name was and a little show off detail, "I'm a pro biker so that's why I'm fine."
Whilst chatting I must of slipped in a few facts about myself due to my shock, as I recall saying it was my last day at my job and they were all probably thinking I just couldn't be bothered to turn up for my last day!


Well panic over, so I thought, he put me in my car and asked me for a pen, at this point I asked if he would like my insurance details to which he replied "no" (he was quite a gentleman to be fair) instead he gave me his email address for work and told me to send him an email when I got to work otherwise he would worry because of the amount of shock I had seemed to of developed.


This left me laughing in a reply of, "I nearly hit you but your the one checking up on me" and then off he went on his bike and off to work I went.


I did think it was a bit odd having his email address and a bit worried he may later want my insurance details. There would be me the ex student skint as anything working a temp job to get out that stupid overdraft forking further into it for a "near miss". Me being me however, (not rude, has a guilty conscious) I put my keyboard to work and sent him an email in which I thanked him for his concern and apologised for my stupidity as well as notifying him I'd made it to work. This all consisted of around four lines.


About half an hour later I received an email back from bike man consisting of three paragraphs! He told me of his injury but said he was made of steel. He then went on to make me feel better (well this is what his aim was) by telling me of accidents he had been part of where he actually was hit. To conclude his email he again told me he was built for endurance and then said how; "once he had calmed down, to have a near miss with what turned out to be a beautiful woman was actually a good thing in his day."
Did I email him back? I'm afraid I didn't.


1. I'm not too sure on whether the email would of led to a date of some sort in which case how do you act around a guy you could of potentially killed?
2. If we were to date and it ended badly would he then want my insurance details?
3. I just don't think he was my type. (In fact I know, I couldn't remember what he looked like so with the name off the email I tracked him down via Facebook, as you do, and checked him out!)


Sorry Mr Bike man if you read this. You were a gentleman, just not mine.

Small world or are do you just "know everyone" ?

I was seeing this guy a few months and all the time there was this one girl on Facebook who always had to comment on his status, like his status, comment on his wall or whatever else there was left for her to do. At the time I thought it was just an obsession with him (because yeah ok give it to him he was pretty damn tasty!) 


Recently though I've had a few guys add me from Peterborough and as you do, you browse on their profile have a ganders see if they're a total player (which yes they all are) and then just see what they're all about. 
One thing I did learn about them all is they all have this girl in common and guess what!? She also likes all their status' and comments like there is no tomorrow!


Yes I'm having a bitch about some girl I've never met but I just wonder if she has anything better to do with her life? She obviously doesn't have a boyfriend otherwise she wouldn't be putting herself out there through social networking because personally from being up so many guys arses like that (this is not literal) she must just need a good seeing to?


I'm fed up of seeing her name and profile picture everywhere with her agreeing comments and liking hands! Does she not have any self respect?


So please someone sort her out so then if I was to ever bump into her somewhere I don't end up gauging my eyes out from seeing her so much previously!